I started the year determined to blog daily, to devote time every evening to developing my writing skills, and some sort of all around life makeover. As evidenced by the datestamps on my blog entries, I haven’t kept up that resolution. My work in progress isn’t making much progress.
It’s easy to get into a negative line of thinking and decide that I’ve failed. One goal I set for myself was to knock down the negativity and keep trying when I stumble. Luckily, I think that’s one area where I am succeeding.
I no longer look at my home and view the clutter as indications that I have failed, I simply get up and do something. Rather than expect an overnight transformation from packrat to Martha Stewart, I hope to make sure that every night is a little better than the one before.
I’ve stopped viewing Khaila’s tantrums as a testament to my shortcomings as a mother. I’ve started to find other ways of dealing with her and working past the “terrible twos”. So far, some of the best ideas have come from Montessori teachings. We have started including her in our daily lives, not as a child but as a participating member of the family. Once, I would have thought it was too much to expect a two year old to help with laundry, dishes, or general cleaning. Now I know that she actually enjoys doing these tasks. We do them together and she beams with satisfaction when we’re done. Eventually she hits her limit and Rick and I finish the task while she goes off to color or play.
Two months into the year, I think the mental change is greater than any changes on the outside. The dedication to have a more positive attitude is powerful. One step in front of the other really is the way to lasting change no matter how corny it sounds.